the Wry Baby Blog

THE STORY SO FAR
Mysterio engages the help of a very hairy female pirate to plot an escape from the vicious pirates.

Together the hairy pirate woman and I concocted a plan for my escape. With some crude scissors found in the hold and some bits of splintered wood, we worked for hours on end. Jars of pigment were hidden in the lush folds of the lady pirate’s thick body hair as were bits of curtain from the Captain’s chamber. Yes, all was smuggled to my cell where I could work unseen using every bit of fantastic talent that Allah had cursed me with. Finally the stage was set. Once we knew the Pirate crew to be asleep we put set our plan into action!

When the crew awoke, they found themselves tied firmly with the strongest, yet most luxurious thread they had ever seen. Each Pirate was wrapped in a contrasting thread that complimented his pirate garb perfectly. A Pirate in blue, wrapped with golden orange thread awoke first and his startled cries eventually alerted the entire ship. The Captain, cross-stitched high upon the main sail was the last to awaken and his expletives could barely be heard from where we sat laughing. Our plan had worked perfectly. Once we shaved the entirety of the lady pirates copious hair we employed my extraordinary seamster skills to weave it into the strongest of steely thread. Then it was just a matter of coloring each length of hair-rope to match the pirate that was to be bound. Remarkably simple! The lady pirate then acted as our Captain, guiding us into the port of Charleston, SC (she even acted as our customs agent).

At last, once my precious cargo of baby t-shirts was unloaded onto a locomotive, we bid farewell to each other and I climbed aboard for the short journey to Mooresville, North Carolina where I would deliver my goods to Wry Baby. The lady pirate sailed off into the sunset, her now bald head twinkling in the dusk. And the Pirate Captain? What of he and his crew? If you ever find yourself in the great city of Charleston, South Carolina, ask a local guide to take you to Union Pier. There you can see the rotting corpses of the crew hanging in rusty iron cages and the Captains’ head impaled on a great stake near the cruise terminal that reads, “Pyrates an’ Their Brethren Be Warned!”.

Thank you, Dear Reader, for hearing my tale of high sea adventure. I’m proud to say that you may find the very items that survived this fantastic adventure in a specialty boutique near you. Please be sure to tell your local shopkeeper that Mysterio sent you and told you all about his incredible ordeal. You both may wish to have a laugh over it! And for those of you dear Readers with little ones, I wish you and yours a very happy holiday and a merry New Year.

WE HOPE YOU ENJOYED MYSTERIO’S HIGH-SEA ADVENTURE!

Click here to read Chapter One.

Click here to read Chapter Two.

Click here to read Chapter Three.

Twelve possible futures, each one sealed in a cute muslin bag. What future awaits YOUR child? Find out now! Look for Mysterio Predicts ($12.95) in a fun gift store near you or online at wrybaby.com.